Your Divorce Is Final, Now What?

Your marriage has ended when the judge says your divorce is final, but you also need to recognise that this is a beginning too. Our solicitors Leeds office appreciates that is well aware that if either spouse has been bombarded with negative comments throughout the separation and divorce, or feels like a failure since their marital relationship didn't work out, it may be tough to adapt to life after divorce. However hard your separation and divorce might have been, looking at the first day of your post-divorce life as a new start is vital.

 

What Comes After The  Divorce Settlement?

Having to go through a separation and divorce is not a very pleasant experience. You need to deal with the reason for the divorce and you need to deal with the idea that something you believed would last forever won't happen. Too often, individuals think that if they are able to just get the separation and divorce finalised then their life would be okay and back to normal.

 

The problem is that the issues and feelings that you had before the divorce was  finalised can't just magically go away overnight. You may have spent years, even decades building a strong emotional connection with your spouse. Those feelings just aren't going to stop because the judge said so. Even if you hate your partner now, those are still feelings you have to deal with.

 

The best advice is to get through one day at a time and start looking at the future that you now have open to you.

 

Learning To Cope With Unhappiness

You are not going to be able to get through a separation and divorce without it impacting your life. Even if the divorce is the right course of action, it's still going to be an incredibly emotional event. It's virtually impossible that your life isn't going to be affected in some way.

 

The emotions of a separation and divorce are so powerful that it is very likely that you're going to be sad for a while. When everything is finalised, some might feel like staying in bed for a week so they don't have to see anyone, or they might shed a few tears over the coming weeks. There's nothing wrong with feeling like this, it's perfectly normal, and dealing with your emotions in whatever way feels best for you is probably a good thing. If you really want to start living the new life that's in front of you, it's important that you give yourself permission to be unhappy for a little bit after the divorce process.

 

Some individuals try and bury those types of feelings. However, as the majority of solicitors will tell you, if they do that they are only delaying them. Sooner or later they're going to have to be dealt with.

 

Take Control Of Your Life After A Divorce Process

After your divorce becomes final, chances are you will find yourself overcome with sadness. However, as you continue to get through each day, you will eventually start to feel better and better. Remaining in firm control of your life is a good way to try and get yourself back on track.

 

A lot of cases of divorce fit the profile of one person wanting the separation and divorce, while the other individual doesn't. If you're the one who was “wronged” in the marital relationship, it makes it very easy to take on the mentality of a victim instead of being in control.

 

It is important for you to determine who you're going to be in your new post-divorce life. A lot of men and women think that it helps to look at things which you enjoyed before you got married. What kinds of things did you do that gave you more confidence? It may be very helpful to look at those things when you are deciding who you would like to be in your new life.